Godzilla vs. King Kong
An epic rematch where size does matter!
April 3rd, 2006
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| When I was just a child, my older brother and I had quite a few rivalries. We would even flip through the phone book beginning to end seeing who could get their finger on the page fastest at each turn to declare, "Mine!" This meant the object you were pointing at was yours and you moved on to the next page. Of course being a few years older, my brother always got the motorcycle and I was stuck with the delivery van. One of our fiercest rivalries came between King Kong and Godzilla. One again my brother got first pick, which left me with Godzilla. Not that I really minded this time because I thought that in a fight, with his blow torch breath and cascading electrical back, Godzilla would just pummel King Kong. Not so, according to my brother, he would always point out how much bigger Kong's brain is and therefore, he could outwit Godzilla. He would explain that Godzilla's brain was only the size of a pea which made him a big dumb lizard. Well, the day came that the 1963 movie, King Kong vs. Godzilla was finally on TV. This was before the days of cable, movies of this caliber were usually aired on Saturday afternoons or late night. None the less, the battle was terrific, and I must admit I really felt that Godzilla had the upper-hand. Unfortunately the director conspired against me and gave the draw to Kong, who swam home victorious after apparently drowning Godzilla in the ocean. At least that is what the big brained monkey wanted us to think. In reality, Godzilla is perfectly at home under the water and while he certainly swam off in disgrace, he was never dead and certainly not defeated. None the less I was forced to bear years of humiliation over the loss of my champion. All the while I knew that something just wasn't right. Eventually, the conspiracy became evident. They made Kong way bigger than he is in "real life." While King Kong is measured in feet, Godzilla in measured in stories (see figure). Thankfully, through the magic of modern CGI effects, we finally have two modern movies that make this difference crystal clear, Godzilla (1998) and King Kong (2005). Both movies have their climactic scenes in NY City, so the comparison is easy to make. It is obvious that Godzilla would simply | |
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crush Kong with his big right toe, or claw or whatever you call it. Now I'm sure that Kong would be at least a bit of a nuisance before the big squish. Kong is pretty quick and climbs like a monkey, especially because he is a monkey. In the end however, as the tag-line from Godzilla says, "Size Does Matter." Plus, Kong is an emotional mess and is way to easily distracted by the ladies. Godzilla on the other hand, is a machine of destruction, punching holes through buildings and crushing cars in his mouth like crackers. We may never get to see these two titans finally go at it again, but that is only because the movie would only last about 5 minutes and you wouldn't even get to finish your popcorn. If they did make it however, I would be there with my older brother, and I am certain it would get only 1 toilet. - Richard Okelberry, Managing Editor |
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