UNL Skybars Open for Business.
Administration Continues to Ignore State Alcohol Prohibition in Skyboxes.
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October 26th, 2006 - Now I know that there isn't a single husker fan out there that is surprised by the fact that the elite members of the UNL skybox community are drinking alcohol during the Nebraska football games. I think that just about everyone in this State has come to except that there is a certain level of aristocracy with the UNL system. Naturally, University officials are going to turn a blind eye to nearly any activities that a skybox "owner" wants to participate in. In fact, I have known for many years that alcohol was being permitted by the UNL administration. You see I personally know someone that used to clean the skyboxes for the University back when they were first completed. This currently anonymous individual explained that shortly after complaining about the presence of alcohol in the skyboxes the administration removed its staff from cleaning services and replaced them with a private janitorial service. By doing so the University would appear to be blind to the situation and would avoid upsetting our beloved and valuable skybox owners. Of course, I imagine that if someone, say within the State Police would sit down and interview employees they would find that this kind of cover-up has been going on ever since the skyboxes were built. In fact I doubt it would be very difficult to find someone to testify under oath that they had been present in one of the skyboxes when both top UNL administrators and alcohol were present at the same time. For those of you that are upset by this; I invite you to sell your season tickets in protest. The University will simply replace you with another eager fan and you can watch the game at home for $30 bucks on pay-per-view while you drink all you want. |
You see, this is not a democracy where everyone is equal, it's a Huskerocracy, where big bucks can get you a nice parking spot on the west side of the stadium, a tailgating bar called the Champions Club to warm up at before the game and a birds eye view of the game where you can cheer on the Huskers while drinking a beer and getting a lap-dance if you so choose. Heck, have a bad day and your contributions can even get the Head Coach fired if you like. It's all about the money at Husker Nation so sit down, shut-up and feel lucky that you're even allowed to look at the players on the field. Oh, and by the way… If you feel something warm sprinkling on the back of your neck from above at the next home game, just remember that it's because YOU ARE just a PEE-ON!!!.......... In the meantime do like everyone else does and get completely blitzed in the parking lot before the game. HUSKER… POWER, Husker… Power, husker… power… -Richard Okelberry, Managing Editor |
Appendage: November 1st, 2006 by the Author Richard Okelberry, Managing Editor
I hear that, UNL Chancellor Harvey Perlman plans to sit down with the student association and discuss the issue of alcohol in the skyboxes. For those of you that think that some sort of resolution may come out of this, like a total ban on alcohol in the skyboxes, think again. Do you even know the kind of people that rent those skyboxes? They are some of the most powerful and wealthy individuals in the state. The list of attendees to the skyboxes includes judges, politicians and high dollar donors to the University. Of course someone could make the argument that if the Chancellor's remarks about the skybox owners being mere tenants who expect a certain amount of privacy is true, then the same principle should apply to student housing. I mean, the last time I checked, students had to abide by a long list of restrictions to rent a dorm room from the University, including near random searches of their residence. I imagine that when the University Police catch wind of infractions that involve the use of alcohol in a dorm room, they are knocking on the door in minutes. Not true for the skyboxes though. Why? Because even as upperclassmen, err upper-class-persons as they say in the Women's Studies Department, you are still a member of the lower class in the eyes of University officials. Let's face it, you can complain all you want and nothing will be done. After all, you are not your parents. Your parent's generation would have held protests, vigils and sit-ins to fight a University that holds personal privacy in such low regard while giving every courtesy to its social elite. Now days the only protest you might see on campus is being held by the naked girl with cuts of meat drawn on her body and handing out P.E.T.A pamphlets. Just grab your books, go to class and say "moooo" or "baaaaaah" every once in a while. Who knows, graduate, make a gazillion bucks and you too may find yourself someday sitting behind the glass with a drink in your hand. Until then, know your place!
Because it can be difficult to express sarcasm in writing please understand that this article is intended to expose an opposing view to my own.
